Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Wow and the year is just a flying .....

I really can't believe the year is flying by like it is ~ it has made me so very thoughtful about so many things. What life was like at this time last year ~ all that has happened in the last year, how life will change in the next year coming up. It's birthday time for this gal in a couple days .... and this birthday is going to be different than many that I have had ~ for so many reasons.

So much has gone on in my life in the last year (even the few years really) ~ so many life changes, and all affecting me deeply in some way. I have learned alot about myself ~ not all of it I have liked looking at ~ but I would say at this time in my life I can look in my mirror in the morning and say "Ok woman - not bad ~ always a work in progress but at least you are heading in the right direction for a change". In a few things I have taken a hiatus in the last year and a half - like my scrapbooking ~ which of late I have a great pull to get myself back into doing something creatively. I have actually started knitting of late - ha ha I know that may sound like a grandma thing to do ~ but I actually find it a calming activity and I can do it while watching the food network or Nascar races and I am a content woman ~ and I also feel a sense of pride that I am basically teaching myself - off the internet!! Awesome how handy the internet can be for so many things ~ while I agree that people need a healthy and aware viewpoint of all that can be found on the internet - it certainly has opened up communication and research in so many ways. I am looking forward to getting life to a smoother routine so that I can indulge a bit more in things I love to do creatively. Again this is something I look forward to in the next year.

I am also trying to start writing more again ~ journalling ect. ~ and I would like to get back to blogging on a regular basis, I find that prose is something you can lose if you don't keep it sharp. When I write I tend to think and figure things out alot more clear headed ~ lifes little ups and downs are easier to travel and big decisions seem to be alot less intimidating. Changes in life feel more natural. And life is full of changes ..... seems in the last almost eight months it has been just plump full with them. On one hand it's been great ~ I accept change as a growth in life, a way to step forward and get it done! So to speak haha - and in other ways change has been hard - I have had to watch friends and loved ones die, leave friends and try and figure out what I really want in life or out of my life.

I have found an amazing love in life ~ it only took me a few decades haha but I am blessed actually to have had this man come into my life at this time, even a year earlier in my life and our relationship may have not weathered as well. When they say it's all in the timing - correct - at least for us it was, and I am so grateful that we met at a time where we really could "see" each other and also be patient to know and understand all the work involved to keep a loving relationship ... well ... loving. It definitely is work everyday - but like he says when there are two working towards the same end then it is half the work and twice the fun. :) Agreed.

I have been blessed by some amazing friends in life ~ people that support and care for me as I do them, that I can talk openly with and share life experiences with ~ we learn from each other and we are all growing in our own ways. I have learned the valuable lesson that sometimes no matter how much will you have to be someone's friend - it takes two - just as in any relationship ~ two to work towards a common goal - and even more valuable that you can't make this work with everyone. And that is not a negative aspect of life, just a real one ~ even if you think you are a good friend and can get along with anyone, in reality this is just not so ~ and just as in good friendships and relationships it is important to learn to "Agree to Disagree" it is important in life to "Learn to Let Go". I use to be so upset if a relationship ended - whether personal or friend wise, would wonder constantly "what did I do wrong? What could have I done to make things different?" I have finally found some peace in life in just the last year realizing that it wasn't me or the other person ~ that made it not work ~ it was "US", and sometimes you just have to let something go rather than analyze it to death, remember the strong and good points and get on with it. :)

So with my birthday fast approaching ~ and for a first time in a long long long time I am going to celebrate it with a special someone, and he planned something special so that I could have just what I needed this year ~ for my soul and for peace in my heart. I am actually looking forward to celebrating it and kicking off another year - will be another one full of change and growth - and looking at things with a brighter perspective and hope in my heart. I am even trying to re-capture (as he is) some joy in my heart for the Christmas season ..... and think of this as a fresh start to find peace and happiness deep inside and hold on to it.

Yes Birthdays are definitely refection points of the year ..... mine and others .....

Cheers :)

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