Tuesday, April 12, 2011

There will be these days ...

If I had a formula for bypassing trouble, I would not pass it round. Trouble creates a capacity to handle it. I don't embrace trouble; that's as bad as treating it as an enemy. But I do say meet it as a friend, for you'll see a lot of it and had better be on speaking terms with it. ~Oliver Wendell Holmes

I have been struggling to keep a positive attitude ~ I have not been winning the fight with my health lately and it is amazing how not being well affects everything in life, the big one is your mental state and how you view your "world". I think the biggest and most important difference from where I am now and where I was three years ago - is knowledge and awareness. Three years ago feeling like this would control everything in my life ~ I would be so wrapped up in the pain and the misery of how I felt that my mental state would trully match my physical one, it would be a mess. There would be no struggling to keep a positive attitude, one would likely just not be found. How my life has changed since being diagnosed with Celiac Disease and putting a name to what my body was doing, how it was attacking itself.

It's no fun feeling almost like I did when I was first diagnosed, I know there are more issues and likely some different avenues I will have to follow once I have more testing done, but at least now I do what I can to make a difference. I do my best to watch what I am eating, I make appointments with doctors and specialists to get the ball rolling, and I look for avenues to inspire me and motivate me to keep my spirits up. And I try not to fall into the unwell "depression and anger" that I know is out there ~ I have a name for this now, something to continue to work with. And I try not to be as hard on myself as I know I can be.

Try Try Try ...
because that is all we can do in life ... going back to the "near-perfect" analogy :) It's what I tell my son even today - as he heads into finals and exams for University - "All you can do is try and give it your best, if that does not work - then you try some more."

There will be these days ... the days where I feel sick, achy, headaches, and the feelings follow of being edgy, and angry, and sad ... yes they will come ... but they will also go ... and then a better day will follow ... and I will "try" again to make it a grand one.

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